What type of friend are you?

The above might sound strange but stay with me.

Imagine this. A mate tells you she's going to Ibiza.

There are three ways you can respond, and I reckon they map almost perfectly onto the three types of salesperson.

Friend 1 says: "Ah amazing, we've been five or six times. You HAVE to go to Ushuaïa. Watching the sunset on the beach is unreal. Make sure you do that."

She heard Ibiza. Then immediately made it about herself. Most people do this just listen to other peoples convos.

Friend 2 says: "Nice. Have you watched Yellowstone? We've just started it. John Dutton is a legend."

He didn't hear a word. He was waiting for his turn to talk. Again all to common. And sales people are the worst for this.

Friend 3 says: "What made you pick Ibiza? Have you been before? Who are you going with? What are you most looking forward to?"

Friend 3 is the rarest of the three, and it's not close.

Most reps are friend 1 or friend 2. They hear a trigger word and pitch, or they miss what was actually said because they were loading up their next question. I've done both. We all have.

knows they should ask more questions, nobody's ever sat in a training session and been shocked by that.

When you need the deal, you can't be curious. You're too busy steering. Every answer they give gets assessed for whether it moves you closer to a close, and the second you hear something you can use, you jump on it. Curiosity is expensive when you're desperate, because a genuinely open question might take the conversation somewhere that doesn't help you.

Which is why the reps who are best at this are usually the ones who need it least.

Which rep were you on your last call honestly? Hit reply and tell me. I’ll read and reply to every one.

Luke O'Nien on The High Performance Podcast.

If you thinking who the hell is Luke O’Nein. He’s a professional footballer at my beloved SAFC who worked his way up from League 2 to the Premier League. He gives one of the most honest interviews I've listened to in good a while.

The line that stopped me: he reckons around 90% of professional footballers are playing in a state of survival, driven by fear and expectation.

Ninety percent. In a job people dream about.

I sat with that one for a couple of days, because I spent a huge chunk of my career in exactly that state. Every quarter starting from zero. Hitting target and immediately deciding it was a fluke. Waiting to be found out.

And from coaching salespeople, I can tell you it's just as common in sales as he says it is in football. Top performers. New reps. Managers. People you'd never guess. Most people have it.

He didn't fix it with a technique either. It was a slow shift out of survival and that's the same shift that turns a Rep 1 into a Rep 3. You stop protecting what you've got and start building more. You stop needing every opportunity to close, because you trust there'll be another one.

Worth an hour of your week.

I promised a few of you my cold calling framework. Here it is OPTICS:

O — Opening. A pattern interrupt to grab attention and earn permission to keep going.

PT — Problems + Think. Share problems you see in businesses like theirs, then ask a question that makes them reflect on their own situation.

ICS — Impact, Clue, Small ask. Deepen the pain, tease the solution rather than presenting it, and close on a low-commitment next step.

That's it. It fits on a Post-it, which is the point.

My stocks and shares portfolio crossed £450k this week.

The number isn't the interesting part. What's interesting is what it's done to how I sell.

Financial independence at 45 is the plan. Four years to go, and I'm on track. But the thing nobody tells you about building a pot like that is that the pot itself starts changing your behaviour long before you actually get to use it. I don't need every deal. So I don't chase them. I can tell a prospect they're not a fit and mean it.

Which brings this whole edition full circle, really. Rep 3 isn't a technique you learn. It's what becomes available to you once you stop being desperate and needy.

Great sales people have an abundance mindset. Sandler coined this fraze (I think). If you’ve not read about it you should.

[YouTube link — full breakdown of the numbers and what I'm invested in - It’s not financial advice and I am not a financial advisor it’s just what I have done for the last 11 years]

Thanks for reading.

See you on the next one.

Stu